《劍16》Test 3 大作文詳解 | 通過提高物價抑制含糖食品的消費？

《劍16》Test 3 大作文

破題

又是經(jīng)典的同意與否，并且劍16 似乎對于  “糖” 偏愛有加，流程圖及大作文都分別提到了 “糖”。

本題一個常見 “跑題”方法在于大篇幅論證含糖食物之于人們的健康危害是什么，或者主要論證少吃糖的好處是什么。出現(xiàn)這樣問題的原因大抵是因為只看了題目的前一句話，而忽略了后一句話。尤其是后句中的 “to consume less sugar”。

于是，以后看題要切記先搞清楚題目讓我們論證什么，而不能主觀臆測，拋掉題目寫作。

本題論證若論同意，則重點論證題中所給建議的有效性；若論不同意，則可指出題中方法的不合理之處，并且給出別的可替代方法。

01

Over-consumption of sugar, which is prevalent recently, is a major contributor to health problems like tooth decay or diabetes. To cut sugar intake, some propose increasing the price of sugary products. Is this proposal viable? Yes.

? 開頭段的寫作不用長，改寫題干+問題即可。倒也不必一味陳述句，嘗試自問自答一下。

? Tooth decay n. 蛀牙 

? Viable adj.  可行的

? Prevalent adj. 普遍存在的

? Cut v. 減少

02

Making sugary products more expensive, at first glance, seems unfair and regressive, as it fails to take into account people’s incomes, and it may disproportionately impact low earners. As a result, while the low-income people may consume less sugar-based products, those higher earners, who find the increased cost immaterial, are highly likely to keep the status quo. In this case, this proposal can hardly reduce the overall sugar consumption. A closer look, however, suggests that it is actually a feasible approach with far-reaching implications. 

? 本段采取了很常見的一種讓步角度：即說某種措施不公平【影響一類人，而不影響另外一類人】，也就是我們常說的思慮不周。至于反駁部分，不妨只寫本段的最后一句話，給出籠統(tǒng)的信息，留待下段展開細說。

? disproportionately  adv. 不成比例的

? Immaterial adj.無關緊要的

? Feasible adj. 可行的

? keep the status quo 【動詞短語】保持現(xiàn)狀

03

First, this approach is a signal, conveying a message that the authorities recognize the excessive intake of these products are hazardous to health. For those high earners who are health-conscious enough, they would definitely control their sugar intake in response to the message. And what if they are not, their extra expenses on sugary products, generating taxes, would at least increases the government’s revenues, which could be allocated to health promotion campaigns aiming to instill in people health awareness. Sooner or later more people would cultivate health awareness, thereby curtailing sugar intake. In addition, with more people consciously curbing sugar consumption, the increased price actually incentivizes manufacturers to develop alternative products catering to customers’ changing tastes. For example, they may remove sugar in bread, lower sugar in beverages, or replace sugar in biscuits. Hence, people are allowed to shift their demand to those low-sugar substitutes. 

? 從兩個方面【人&廠家】論述這個方法之于限制人糖的攝入的可行性，從而使文章內(nèi)容更加豐富。同時記得回應前段的讓步部分。

? Hazardous adj. 有害的 【尤指對人的健康或者安全方面】

? health-conscious adj. 重視健康的

? Allocate v. 分配...給

? Curtail v. 削減，限制

04

In conclusion, in terms of curbing people’s sugar consumption, increasing the price of sugary products, which decreases their sales, is effective, but it can really do so much more - funding health promotion activities and behooving manufacturers to remake products.  

? 結尾段，重新點明文章立場+概述分論點即可?？汕f要注意這里立場的給出不能與前文不符。